a few days ago, i found myself after school with a few hours and nothing pressing to get completed before meeting cassandra at the gym. at the very moment i sat down at my desk and began appreciate having nothing pressing to accomplish in the next window of time, i looked over and saw a few heads poking up in the window signalling me to open the hallway. i let him in and he stopped by my classroom for one of our chats. he told me of life in palestine, and some unbelievable stories about what he's seen in his short life. about run-ins with the israeli army, and how different his experience was as an american citizen, which he felt makes him virtually untouchable. about family members jailed and tortured, and about his desire to return to palestine when he's 30, because thats old enough where he'd feel fine about dying, to open fire on israeli soldiers. how parents don't want to outlive their children, but how he never wants to outlive his parents. how he can't imagine living when he dad doesnt.
i sat there as a 13 year old boy started getting all choked up talking about how he would do anything for his parents, how he wishes he could give them the world because they gave him the world. it was so interesting to see such a deep side to this kid. then we came to the subject of religion. a treat for me, because as an educator, in the classroom during instructional hours, talking about religion is innappropriate. but, in my room after school, sharing stories, it was an informal enough setting it seemed appropriate. we talked about islam and christianity. he explained to me about his beliefs and the Quran and Mohammed. i told him pieces of what i believed. we talked about prayer and explained to me how he prayed, and told me how he always prays for his brother to be healed and for his family to be kept safe. and he described the holiness of mecca, and how even though his parents think he is saving for a car, he is really saving money to fund a trip for his grandmother to visit mecca and pray at the holy wall.
it was a beautiful experience because as he was speaking i was able to feel the truth that transcended religious denomination. it became quietly apparent how truth is truth, and it illustrated our belief of how throughout history, truths have been altered or manipulated, some well intentioned, many not, but to see how things all come from the same root.
as he spoke to see how peices of the puzzles all fit together. it was beautiful. it was insightful. it was a conversation with a 13 year old student about faith and family and God, that left me fulfilled not only on a professional level (a definite "this is why i teach" moment) but also on a spritual one as well.
26 January 2007
20 January 2007
semester end
the semester ended yesterday. i'll get all new kids on monday. i'm going to miss my old kids so much. i already do. it's like i want to create these really awesome inspiring field trips to invite them along to be able to still talk with and check in with them.
01 January 2007
what i learned in 2006
Monday, January 01, 2007
Current mood: contemplative
2006 was a rough year on me. i faced some things that i never thought i'd have to deal with. but luckily, things are looking up. maybe one day I'll be glad all this happened. until this year, i've had it really easy. but, it may prove to be to my advantage--because the next time i have to deal with a really crappy, heart-wrenching "its just life" kind of a thing, at least i'll have a little experiece. i've realized that every thing we go through, both the good & the bad, teaches us something.
so here is WHAT I LEARNED IN 2006.....
that when things got tough, my true friends were the ones that were there at the end of the day. that i have fabulous friends.
that having my heart broken hurts. a lot.
that getting lost in the moment and doing something slightly irresponsible, still feels good, and isn't necessarily regrettable.
that my family, friends, students & overweight cat are all very protective of me.
that spending hours at starbucks just chatting really is time well spent.
that i'm grateful for my family.
that as much as i appreciate the good in my current situation, i still get a little envious of my friends with the hubbies, homes & babies.
that planning a high school reunion is fun, even when you get stuck footing the bill.
that when you do get stuck footing the bill, there will be a few sweethearts that step up to help you out. :)
that even if you plan a five year reunion, very few people will actually show up.
that if i plan the ten year, i'm collecting $$ upfront.
that i still love the city.
that booking a trip to hawaii is totally worth it.
that sometimes the only way to heal is to take things one day at a time.
that its a good thing for me to have a crush on someone.
that i still love the beach.
that high school kids smoke a lot of weed.
that my students think im nerdy & white. and i am.
that gangs & drugs & fighting & guns & court dates are very much a part of many my kids' lives. that some of my students will lie right to my face. and its not always the ones i'd expect.
that others would never lie to me at all. and its not always the ones i'd expect, either.
that its therapeutic to laugh.that its also therapeutic to cry.
that focusing on others is a good way to stop feeling sorry for yourself.
that im not an average 23 year old.
that i prefer being married to being single.
that you can get a speeding ticket in an alley.
that when you look for the good in any situation, you can find it.
that getting dressed up and going out is worth it.
that i love what i do.that its impossible to be optimistic if nothing bad ever happens.
that slumber parties are still fun. even in a twin bed.
that teachers don't make enough money.
that i DO know myself, and i like who i am.
that i'm not yet who i would like to be.
that thursday nights are excellent. for a lot of reasons.
that i did everything i could.
that i am incredibly, undeniably lucky.
that sometimes things don't work out the way you want them to.
that the only way to get through something is to keep going.
that eating fast food late at night is discusting. and that no matter how much i think i want it, it is still discusting.
that mcdreamy is HOT.
that i have many students who live more "adult" lives than i do.
that it is possible to teach a full day on only a few hours of sleep.
and sometimes its actually worth itthat teenagers are brutally honest.
that starting over doesn't necessarily mean being in unfamiliar surroundings.
that prayers are always answered, even when the answers may be totally different than what i had in mind.
that if he's not coming after me, there's nothing to figure out.
that i've got a lot to learn.
and most of all, that life goes on.
WHAT I HOPE TO LEARN IN 2007.....
that having a gym membership is worth it.
that yoga is all its cracked up to be.
that photography can be a profitable hobby.
that managing my finances responsibly is possible.
that mac really is better.
that being health conscious makes a difference.
that getting out of debt feels excellent
that second chances aren't wasted.
that dancing isn't scary.
that i'm right about him.
that prioritizing and then spending my time money accordingly really is liberating.
that i do have enough time to read and learn about things that are important to me.
that when i pour my whole self into something, it's worth it.
Current mood: contemplative
2006 was a rough year on me. i faced some things that i never thought i'd have to deal with. but luckily, things are looking up. maybe one day I'll be glad all this happened. until this year, i've had it really easy. but, it may prove to be to my advantage--because the next time i have to deal with a really crappy, heart-wrenching "its just life" kind of a thing, at least i'll have a little experiece. i've realized that every thing we go through, both the good & the bad, teaches us something.
so here is WHAT I LEARNED IN 2006.....
that when things got tough, my true friends were the ones that were there at the end of the day. that i have fabulous friends.
that having my heart broken hurts. a lot.
that getting lost in the moment and doing something slightly irresponsible, still feels good, and isn't necessarily regrettable.
that my family, friends, students & overweight cat are all very protective of me.
that spending hours at starbucks just chatting really is time well spent.
that i'm grateful for my family.
that as much as i appreciate the good in my current situation, i still get a little envious of my friends with the hubbies, homes & babies.
that planning a high school reunion is fun, even when you get stuck footing the bill.
that when you do get stuck footing the bill, there will be a few sweethearts that step up to help you out. :)
that even if you plan a five year reunion, very few people will actually show up.
that if i plan the ten year, i'm collecting $$ upfront.
that i still love the city.
that booking a trip to hawaii is totally worth it.
that sometimes the only way to heal is to take things one day at a time.
that its a good thing for me to have a crush on someone.
that i still love the beach.
that high school kids smoke a lot of weed.
that my students think im nerdy & white. and i am.
that gangs & drugs & fighting & guns & court dates are very much a part of many my kids' lives. that some of my students will lie right to my face. and its not always the ones i'd expect.
that others would never lie to me at all. and its not always the ones i'd expect, either.
that its therapeutic to laugh.that its also therapeutic to cry.
that focusing on others is a good way to stop feeling sorry for yourself.
that im not an average 23 year old.
that i prefer being married to being single.
that you can get a speeding ticket in an alley.
that when you look for the good in any situation, you can find it.
that getting dressed up and going out is worth it.
that i love what i do.that its impossible to be optimistic if nothing bad ever happens.
that slumber parties are still fun. even in a twin bed.
that teachers don't make enough money.
that i DO know myself, and i like who i am.
that i'm not yet who i would like to be.
that thursday nights are excellent. for a lot of reasons.
that i did everything i could.
that i am incredibly, undeniably lucky.
that sometimes things don't work out the way you want them to.
that the only way to get through something is to keep going.
that eating fast food late at night is discusting. and that no matter how much i think i want it, it is still discusting.
that mcdreamy is HOT.
that i have many students who live more "adult" lives than i do.
that it is possible to teach a full day on only a few hours of sleep.
and sometimes its actually worth itthat teenagers are brutally honest.
that starting over doesn't necessarily mean being in unfamiliar surroundings.
that prayers are always answered, even when the answers may be totally different than what i had in mind.
that if he's not coming after me, there's nothing to figure out.
that i've got a lot to learn.
and most of all, that life goes on.
WHAT I HOPE TO LEARN IN 2007.....
that having a gym membership is worth it.
that yoga is all its cracked up to be.
that photography can be a profitable hobby.
that managing my finances responsibly is possible.
that mac really is better.
that being health conscious makes a difference.
that getting out of debt feels excellent
that second chances aren't wasted.
that dancing isn't scary.
that i'm right about him.
that prioritizing and then spending my time money accordingly really is liberating.
that i do have enough time to read and learn about things that are important to me.
that when i pour my whole self into something, it's worth it.
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