quote of the day

me:  i think its supposed to snow tonight

dear student:  i know.  i about ta go bowling, too.  its a win win.  ITS CUPCAKING SEASON!!!

me:  (dear student's name)  hahaha.  you  make me laugh.

dear student:  ms. work....you know what that means?

me:  yes.

dear student:  you know tha slang.  but you don't know what "work" means

me:  yes i do.

dear student:  uh oh.  she knows. 

quote of the day

ya'll ready for church? --dear student to his audience

 

today was our black history assembly at school.  it was nearly and hour and a half long, and had music, dance and poetry presentations, along with a fashion show illustrating celebratory outfits from 3 different african countries.  it was really cool and interesting.  i enjoyed myself. as i sat there, i wished, as i often do, that my eyelids were camera shutters.  to take it all in and be able to share what i was witnessing.  but instead, i just got to watch. 

 

one of my favorite moments was when the dear student mentioned above came up to sing a song...i think it was titled, "rejoice, the lord is come." anyway, this particular student is a big boy.  not fat, but big. like 6'3" 250 lbs, on a 15 year old personality.  he was super smiley.  and VERY light on his feet.  and is a performer in his heart of hearts.  so he came up and asked the crowd..."ya'll ready for church??" everyone went nuts.  and he was beaming.  and then he belted out a luscious gospel tune about rejoicing.  it was lovely.  and about 1/2 way through, the audience started to clap to the beat.  and then, about 3/4 way through one of my other favorite students, an equally large polynesian boy, got up and started dancing, just enjoying the music.  that assembly was a collection of lovely moments.   

quotes of the day

today, i learned a few things.

one of my favorite students and i had the following conversation:

me:  so, will you be able to come in after school today to work off your time?
dear student:  ....i can't.  i have that meeting with my PO.
me:  ah.  ok.  next wed?
dear student:  yah. that will work.
me:  ok good.
me:  so...what did you do to get yourself a PO in the first place?
dear student: (quiet for a moment)  well....i got caught with a gun
me:  ah.  i see.  how did that happen?
dear student:  well, i was buying a gun from this guy, and it went off on him.
me:  what do you mean?
dear student:  uh...i shot him.
me:  oh.  wow.  was it an accident?
dear student: (pause)  ....ummm...yah. (but without eye contact)
me:  hmmm.  were you ever in trouble before that?
dear student:  nah.
me:  since?
dear student:  nah.
me:  well good.  don't get in trouble anymore.
dear student:  i won't.

and

me:  so, will you be able to come in and work off your time today after school?
dear student:  i can't today.  i have my baby.
me:  your what?
dear student:  my son.
me:  oh.  i didn't know you had a baby.
dear student:  really? (then in the background....MS WORKKKK? HOW YOU NOT KNOW SHE HADDA KID??)
dear student:  yah.
me:  how old is he?
dear student:  2
me:  wow.  do you have a picture?
dear student:  yah ill go get it.
she proceeded to show me the picture of her darling little boy and then scheduled her work fee time for next week.  i had no idea she had a child, let alone a two year old.  holy smokes

and

(one of my dear pacific islander students came in after school to work on an assignment.  her twin sister and friend joined her, and they were chatting away in a language that i didn't know.)

me:  what language is that?
dear student:  samoan.
me:  oh wow.   i like it.  (and i do.  it just sounds really cool when they speak it)
dear students (snickering a bit)
me:  which language did you learn first?
dear student:  hindi.
me:  and then?
dear student: and then fijian.
me:  and then?
dear student:  samoan
me: and then english?
dear student:  yep.
me:  can you speak all of them fluently?
dear student:  yep.
me:  holy smokes.  you better put those talents to good use.
dear student:  you can make money with 'dat?

quote of the day

"all i eat is cupcakes and hamburgers because i am so trendy..."thats what the real title of her blog should be.  --dear steph

valentines class cutting

dear student:  ms booth.  i need you to write a note saying i was here today.

me:  why?

dear student:  i just need it.

me: why?

dear student:  ms. booth....just do it.  just write a note sayin i was here. 

me:  why do you need a note saying you were here, if you were here?  you were a half our tardy.

dear student:   right.  but i be here.  just write that.

me:  what do you need it for?

dear student:  just for me.  i collect them.  for my own records.

me:  no, because if you needed a record you could just go to the office and get a print out.

dear student:  no. i need YOU to say i was in your class.

me:  why?

(this went on for another 5 minutes, then i mentioned his absence yesterday...making the connection)

dear student:  aight.  you wanna know why?  see...i had food poisoning yesterday.  i had diarrhea all day.  i couldn't stop going to the bathroom.

me:  ok, but the why do i need to say you were in class today?

dear student:  ok.  so you know how yesterday was valentines day?  you see....this girl...just write the note.

me:  no.  not until you tell me what you are using it for and who you are giving it to.

dear student:  MS BOOTH!  why you bein like this.  i thought we was cool.

me:  we are.  and i'm glad you are back and in my class again.  but, i will not write this until you explain to me what you are using it for.

(again, this went on, back and forth for another 5 minutes.)

dear student:  ok.  i was gone all day yesterday with this girl for valentines day.  and i was absent.  and they called my house saying i was absent.  and my mom is mad.  so i'm just getting notes from my teachers saying i was present in class.

me:  why do you want me to say you are present today?  so you can lie to your mom?

dear student:  not lie.  just leave it up in the air.

me:  absolutely not. 

dear student:  all my other teachers did it.

me:  i do not care. i absolutely will not help you lie to your mother.

dear student:  but now you gonna make me get in trouble.

me:  no, you made yourself get in trouble by cutting class yesterday. 

dear student:  it was valentines day! 

me:  that is not the point.  i am not lying to your mother.

dear student:  don't lie, just write the note.

me:  i will write a note, but it will specify that you were NOT in class yesterday, and that you were a half hour tardy today.

dear student:  why you bein like this.  i thought we were cool.

me:  we are, but if you want a note, that is what it will say.

dear student: fine

so i wrote the following dated note:

(dear student's name) was ABSENT on Monday 2/14/2011.  (dear student's name) was 1/2 tardy, but present in class today, Tuesday 2/15.  His attendance was the following:  Monday 2/14-Absent Tuesday 2/15 present, but tardy.  thanks--my name & extension

dear student:  ahhhhhh....ms. booth.  why you gotta write that? 

me:  do you really think your mom is not going to figure this out?  she's not dumb.  it would be better for you to just fess up, and come clean about cutting, rather than try and fool her with these notes.

dear student:  nah. 

and then i handed it to him and told him she could call me with any questions.  (and i made sure that the part that he wanted was sandwiched between the two parts about him being absent so that he couldn't accidentally rip out the parts he didn't want.

holy smokes.  now, mind you.  i don't want him to get punished physically.  i genuinely do not.  but i think he missed the point of our whole conversation.  

(yes, this is the same dear student that disclosed his disposal techiniques of beloved, deceased hampsters.  see link above.) 

quote of the day

(while watching "the proposal")

ryan reynolds as andrew paxton:  margaret....marry me.  because, i want to date you.

my dearest george:  hey...thats kinda like us. 

not normal.

within the last month there were two stabbings within a 1/2 mile radius of my school.  one of them was a hayward resident stabbed by his father, one was a former tennyson student in a gang related incident.  both were reported to me by the same student in my 6th period class.  two weeks ago, one of our 14 year old students died unexpectedly from a heart condition. within the last week, i have had to stop two shouting matches from escalating to physical violence in my classroom, and today there have been two full blown fights on campus.  i dont even know what to say about these things.  they aren't noticeably related, as they all happened to different people, at different times, yet all felt explosive in some way.  some hit me harder than others for different reasons.  

the stabbing of my former student didn't hit me until i glanced at the article about him in our school newspaper today.  when i heard about initially, it was shocking, because even the word "stab" is repulsive and shocking and violent, but then it just kind of faded like any other news story.  at the time, it impacted me only because of physical location (the neighborhood behind my school) of the incident, and that i was so close by when it occured.  and then that faded too. 

but then, when i opened the newspaper, i realized, he was one of mine.  i dont remember if i had him in class.  if i did, i don't think he had regular attendance.  if i didn't, i remember seeing him around campus enough to feel like i was mine.  i remember his mannerisms.  maybe he was a friend of a student in my class?  i don't remember how i knew him, but i knew him.  and now he is gone.  and there is nothing normal about that.

(girls + expletives) divided by a boy = security

(bell rings.  lots of expletives being screamed in the hallway.  paid it no mind, as it didn't seem entirely out of the ordinary) 

dear student #1:  um....ms. booth, can you stop this please?

crazy dear student outside my classroom:  you a nasty, bi*** a** hoe. (screaming, this same phrase, over and over)

me:  um...(dear student's name) dear, i need you to stop this.  (dear student's name)  repeating different variations of this as she pressed forward into my classroom.

crazy dear student now INSIDE my classroom:  nah.  don't go hiding behind your teacher.  come out here.  you nasty hoe. (this was being shouted over my shoulder.  it was as though the 20 ft gap and my body did not even exist between these two girls, as neither were really acknowledged.) 

me:  (dear student's name)  this needs to stop.  i need you to go outside please.

crazy dear student now outside my classroom:  HOE!!!!!!!!!  NASTY A** SL** HOE!!!!! (screaming, now different variations of this string of expletive names, now outside my classroom door.)

i called the office and said the following: 
favorite admin:  hey jack
me:  hi.  i need security.  i have one girl with me, and two more outside screaming.  and if i let one of them leave, i think there will be a fight. 
favorite admin:  on it. 

moments later i had three security guards there to secure and allieviate the situation.  heaven bless our security team, fast response times and our radio system.  nothing like a little high school girl drama to keep valentines day interesting.   

quote of the day

oh.  this is a nightmare.  this is going to be an absolute measuring nightmare.  --my dearest george on beginning to measure the 20+ frames that are now on our collage wall

quote of the day

me:  i want you to know i floss my teeth more because of you.

my dearest george:  i want you to know i tell the truth more because of you.

quotes of the day

dear student:  i un ker.  that with a "KAY"

 

and

 

(stopping for discussion during "Food, Inc.")

me:  now, oprah ended up winning that lawsuit

students: YAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!  OOOOOOOOO-PRAHH..........

me:  which is good, but it took years and over a million dollars. 

students:  oprah go.

me:  now, here is the problem that still exists.  if IIIIIII got sued, I don't have a million dollars.  so then what would happen?  (trying to get them to see that without an excess of money, being successful in a lawsuit vs. a big corporation is usually a very time consuming, expensive endeavor.)

dear student #1:  we got you miss booth.

dear student #2:  i own e'en kur.

 

 

quote of the day

me:  if you think about it, we are the only animal that drinks another animals milk. 

dear student #1:  that nasty tho

 

quotes of the day

dear student:  bros before goalies (to our girls team goalie)   

and

i been having it since friday. 

and

dear student #1:  booth!  these don have nothin in them anymore.  everything is gone.

me:  oh stop.  they are fine.

dear student #2:  YOUUUU are fine.

me:  oh brother.  you are out of control.  (trying to stifle my laughter)

dear student #3:  YOUUUU are out of control.

and so forth & so on...

and

(while looking through magazines for pictures of simple carbs and complex carbs)

dear student #1:  snookie?

dear student #2:  simple of complex....hmmmm...

quote of the day

me:  i'm sharing these stories with you because i can't share my own experiences, because i don't have children yet. (prepping my child development class to hear some birth stories)

dear student #1:  can we talk about this?

dear student #2:  yah.  when ARE you going to have kids?

dear student #1:  lets see.  you should get pregnant soon.

me:  i don't know when we'll have kids.

dear student #1:  yah.  can you get pregnant in like two weeks?  please?  a month?

quote of the day

dear student #1:  obaaaaaaaaaama..

dear student #2:  i HATE obama.  he been in office for 3 years and done nothin.

dear student #3:  yah!  where's the change?

dear student #1:  we still be havin the same old problems.  nothin change. 

quotes of the day

today, with our 5 year olds, we talked about joseph smith and the first vision.  we took them on a mini "field trip" out to look over at the park across the field and see the all the trees, to listen how quiet it was, and talk about joseph smith prayed in a forest and received an answer.

me:  after joseph prayed, heavenly father & jesus christ appeared.  does anybody know what they said?

austin:  (wide eyed) come with us! (beckoning with his little hands)

i looked over at george, who was trying VERY hard to stifle his laughter.  i almost died.  

and

me:  who do you think won?

george:  the patriots.  

instead of watching the superbowl like everyone else we know, we drove to the city and walked along the path lining ocean beach, and then over to lake merced.  it was beautiful and relaxing, and 80 degrees downtown, and 70 at the beach.  it was lovely.   

quotes of the day

me:  i hope you are not throwing things in my classroom

dear student #1 (who was throwing things): no........

dear studejt #2:  punch him in the face ms. booth!

and

me:  (slumped over stretching my back that i just pulled)

george:  alright, lets go

me:  (looked up at george)

george:  stop doing that (as quietly as possible.)

and

george:  dinner, jack?

me: yes..(trying to figure out what he was referring to as we shopped at costco)

george:  there's some fancy feast right over here....

quote of the day

a convo i witnessed between students as they were viewing all the possible cover design choices for the cookbook we are publishing.  the art & photography students created over 70 different designs to be considered for the cover.  then, i set up a makeshift gallery walk in my classroom so the students could see the designs and vote on their favorites. 

dear student #1:  ah.  why you pick the one with the big a** carrot?

dear student #2: (with a very offended, incredulous look)  YOU a big a** carrot!

quotes of the day

ima be a few minutes late but i'll be thur. --text from my TA  (now, before you get all judgy mcjudgerson, the only reason this student has my cell phone number is because he almost cut his finger off last semester and i wanted his parents to have my contact info.  he proceeded to send me picture messages of the gaping hole in his hand while waiting in the ER, and then the after shot of them gluing it shut.  nasty. 

and

ms booth i dont think i gonna be here tomorrow cuz they about the pull the plug on my grandma.  but, i did my work so it wouldn't be late.  --dear student rushing into class after school

quote of the day

dear student #1:  no, i can't.  it would offend ms. booth.  (quietly, while looking sideways to see if i could hear)

dear student #2:  what.  no it wont.  she don't got kids.

dear student #2:  ms. booth!  you got kids?

me:  nope.

dear student #1:  uhh.....

dear student #3:  just ask her.

me:  if you think it might offend me, it probably will.

dear student #3:  just say it.

dear student #1:  no.  she'll give me the look

dear student #2:  MILF.

me:  not appropriate.

all students:  AHHHHHHHH!!!!  ms. booth....whats a MILF? (as innocently as possible)

me:  it is something that we don't talk about in class.

dear student #2:  she know.

dear student #3:  ok. sexy mom.

me:  no.

dear student #1:  hot mama.  good lookin mom.

me:  you are out of control.